tell me your secret...

i recently read the creative and unique book called Post Secret. if you haven't checked it out, i recommend it. "PostSecret is an ongoing community art project where people mail in their secrets anonymously on one side of a homemade postcard."

so i thought - why not ask people to anonymously submit their secrets about their sexuality! the secret can pertain to anything relating to your sexuality including confusion about sexual orientation, most embarrassing sex moment, favorite sexual position, hottest turn-ons, turn-offs, you get the point. the secret should be one that you have not revealed to anyone. it can be funny, sad, perverted, vanilla, witty, dry, whatever. just be honest, that's all i ask.

if you are up to it, all you have to do is:
1) click on "0 comments" (the 0 might show up as 1, 2, 3, etc depending on # of comments posted). it's down there in the lower right hand side of this post.
2) leave your secret anonymously

once i receive comments, i will list them on the blog for other readers to see.

oh, and one more thing. i am trying to see just how many secrets i can collect. so please, share this blog post with others!

happy writing,
e.

yo no soy senorita

i was recently in colorado visiting family. i asked my parents, who speak spanish, for the male equivalent of "senorita." my dad said "there isn't one, there is only senor." i asked for an explanation and my mother said, "it's like english where there is miss, ms., and mrs." at first i thought nothing of it.

then something clicked in me. why is it that men have the luxury of always being "mr." from the time of birth till the time of death, while women's titles change depending on marital status (and sometimes age)? this doesn't seem fair.

to me, this implies that woman exists only in relation to a partner. she is defined by her marital status and values placed upon her accordingly. a woman can't just be a woman throughout her life. yet another label putting women into narrowly defined boxes.

no me gusta senor, no me gusta

holy shit (pun intended)

this is NOT for children, the faint of heart, or anyone with an aversion to perversion. a friend passed along this information and i could not help but pass it along to you.

it never ceases to amaze me what the human mind is capable of. people will go to great lengths to express their sexuality. some call it "sick," some call it "disgusting," and some call it love. to each their own. but this shit ain't my cup o' tea (or anything else).

consider yourself warned: 2 girls 1 cup

boys vs. girls in the world series of cum

i was talking with a 50-something-year-old female client today. we were talking about her love life (or lack thereof) and i asked if she wants to be in a relationship. she said yes and then went on to say that she has sexual needs. she said a lot of women her age claim to never think about sex. "i think they are all lying," says my client, "or brainwashed by the masses."

i explain to her that women in our country are socialized to refrain from admitting to liking sex. she said, "no, that's not it. it's about cumming."

intrigued i ask her to elaborate. she said, "guys can cum so easily. if they got a prostitute they could just have sex with her without having to see her face and cum. for women, it takes more than that to make us cum. we're more complicated."

hmmm. . . "go on," i say.

"guys are indiscriminate, they can do it with anyone. women have to discriminate more because it's harder for us to cum. if we could cum more easily, we'd probably be more indiscriminate too."

so - what do YOU think?

The great porn debate

Is Pornography Really Harmful?

By Michael Bader and Vivian Dent, AlterNet. Posted November 7, 2007.

In response to Robert Jensen's controversial book, Getting Off, two clinical psychologists debate the intersection of violence and sexual fantasy.

Read all about it: Healthy or Harmful?